The Exhale...

I want to be still.

Life's coming too fast.

We run around with our lists.

Look perfect. Be fantastic. Never tire. Don't stop.

And don't forget to sign that next million dollar plus listing.

To become, we do.  

But all I crave is absolute boredom.

Aspace where nothing stirs or screams. 

Just for a couple of moments. 

A space where the blackberry doesn’t twitch every other second.

and there are no more mails to return. 

A space where I can pay attention to the shape of my feet

and explore the wonder of my heart.

A stillness that I have never been able to lasso into my moving life

as I ride from here to there

expecting something just out of my reach to give me my sigh.

Finally.

My sigh is here.

 I stop. I have found wisdom.

I undress, layer by layer.

The ego of the day is removed

and placed on the shelf the farthest from my heart.

I carefully take off my daily rituals and give them thanks,

but lock them away in a treasure box.  

They are part of me but not needed here,

where the only ritual is to let go.

The quiet nothingness of the dark moon and a soft pillow

the days, the weeks to remind myself that one day I will crave the other side of hibernation

the inhale and movement. 

But for tonight all I want is to exhale.